Second
I’m six
I’m going to be on Skipper Chuck
I’ve won a contest
second
a girl won first
I see two bikes
a pink and a blue
I’m so excited
I think I’ve won
that bike
this is the best day
of my life
I’m with my
grandmother
she squeezes
my hand
I have to go
up on stage
in front of
all the other kids
that fills me
with terror
they laugh and point
I can’t stop thinking
about the bike
I’m standing on the stage
afraid
I wave
I’m wearing
a little Styrofoam hat
like a Mayor’s hat
my short pants
don’t fit right
the first place girl
has won the bike
I win
a wardrobe from Sears
I want
to die
I wish I had never won
second
is the worst place of all
you have to go
up on stage
and you don’t
get a bike
this is the worst day
of my life
I hope
no one else
ever wins
second
Published by The Daily Drunk, December 2020
Best friends
I’m quiet
shy and introverted
I don’t make friends easily
I have just one friend
my best friend
Devin
he has blond curly hair
always smiling
easy going
but somehow questioning
legs splayed
sitting on the sidewalk
outside his house
we talk for hours
about life
about God
about religion
about girls
I’m quiet
but not with Devin
Let’s go to Nathan’s
let’s build a raft
one time he
talked me into
riding my bike
all the way
to Fort Lauderdale
further than
I had ever been
miles and miles
leaving my block
was far for me
leaving my front door
was far
Fort Lauderdale
an adventure
I’ll never forget
I’ll also never forget
the call
his dad answered the phone
he’s gone
he shot himself
my mind
spinning
I didn’t know
what to say
I never
found out
what happened
I guess that’s strange
I just went back
back to being quiet
no more talks
no bike rides to Fort Lauderdale
no best friend
back
back to my block
back to my front door
Published by Skyway Journal, January 2021, Best of the Net 2021 Nominee
Glory and Grace
He disappeared again
I was sleeping
but something stirred
me awake
the car was gone
the old panic
set in
call, call
text, text
track the iPhone
found
near the airport
I know better
but I go anyway
bleary eyed
wandering
a sex club
or technically
a video store
someone’s getting
fucked on the screen
men in silhouette
jerk in rhythm
I track the phone
beep beep beep
in there
a man motions
the booths
connected by
a glory hole
a cock widthdraws
and he’s there
caught in remorse
the red sweatshirt
stuffs the opening
let’s go
he shakes
we have breakfast
we move
from glory hole
to grace
Published by Tealight Press, September 2020